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Should he have to? Does it make his feelings any less real?
The main obstacle is straight men who have sex with men are not usually open about this. Justin Myers, The Guyliner.
James identifies as gay, but his first proper relationship was with a man who did not. This is the thing about coming out: A relationship with a straight guy can, in a way, reverse that, dragging you back into the closet. Although the gay guy in the relationship will try their best to be sympathetic — they know this struggle better than most, after all — it's understandable that their patience will wear thin.
The ability to go public about their relationships is very important to many gay men — even if it attracts negativity. As a fresher at university, Robin, then 18, fell into a relationship with Dom, Says Robin: He absolutely had per cent control over things; the code of conduct imposed on us was coming from him, not me.
Robin decided he would come out, in the hope it would show Dom that it didn't have to be a nightmare.